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I work with individuals, couples and people in multi-partner relationships to help them navigate the big feelings many of us carry around sex and relationships. My approach is both trauma-informed and pleasure-informed. People see me for all kinds of reasons including help processing complicated feelings, help with communication, understanding more about who they are and what they want, understanding more about their habits and complicated behavior, and learning to have a better relationship with love, sex, intimacy and pleasure. Originally from Australia, I am now an honorary New Yorker. I am a clinical sexologist, sex & relationships counselor, Narrative therapist and currently completing a third masters’ degree in Social Work at Hunter.

I am also trained in ACT, DBT, and Somatic Practice with Kathy Kain. I draw heavily on somatic work in my practice blended with Narrative existential and solution-focused strategies. I’m the author of Sex, When You Don’t Feel Like It: The Truth about Mismatched Libido & Rediscovering Desire. I host the podcast ‘The Erotic Philosopher’ and offer a multitude of online courses about sex & relationships. I have contributed to clinical journals globally on topics like how porn informs therapy, affirming counseling for adult industry professionals and how somatic therapies help sex therapy.

I work with adults of all ages, orientations, and gender identities and frequently in the media. You can see all this and more on my website

Cyndi Darnell

Cyndi Darnell



To schedule an appointment or ask questions, please email me directly at

(please do not include personal information in messages).

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